As I packed up everything in the house to move to Springfield; I realized I was moving forward to start again. How many times had I done just that? Why could I believe that this time would be any different? Recently divorced, feeling like a failure, while at the same time recovering from a year and a half battle with ulcerative colitis. The yearlong high doses of steroid had wreaked havoc on my body and my spirit. Now, after surgery to remove all my colon, I was left with the task of marching on while facing the withdrawal of steroids. Not an easy task when fatigue overwhelms you. Behind me lay all the guilt; perhaps, most the feelings that I had failed God. Moments of feeling like a champion of faith mixed with the opposite feelings of having failed. Now I had to find the way to start again.
Throughout the cancer and the fighting with illness, I had learned to arise early each day to be alone with God. That was how I made it through and I knew God would be with me through it all. I gained a lot of strength from reading Paul’s letters: God’s word spoken to guide me through.
GRACE TO START AGAIN
Particularly in those moments of defeat, I must remember God’s Grace is there to lead me on.
Not as though I had already attained, either were already perfect: but I follow after, if that I may apprehend that for which also I am apprehended of Christ Jesus. Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before, I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus. Philippians 3:12-14
I had to learn not to look behind at either the accomplishments I had made, nor in the failures. Either one would paralyze me from focusing on Christ. Focusing on my own failures or accomplishments meant that I took my focus off Jesus and placed my focus on me. My hope to stand depends on how closely I focus on Jesus Christ, His grace.
START AGAIN, ANEW
So, off I went to start anew; eyes focused on Jesus. Little did I know that God would ask me to move twice more over the years; however, His plan has proven the best. Each time, my focus grew clearer and I knew God lead the way.
You see, God’s mercies are new every morning. He never lets go and will even take all your failures and transform them into good; as you turn your eyes to Jesus, the Author and finisher of your faith.
If you don’t know Jesus Christ as your Savior: I urge you to go to my page titled How to Be Saved by clicking on this link, if you have a prayer request email me by clicking here or comment here
CONCLUDING TWEETS:
[tweetthis]This I have learned: God’s Plan is best-no matter what[/tweetthis]
[tweetthis]When you must start again, forget what is behind and focus on Jesus[/tweetthis]
OTHER RESOURCES AVAILABLE
A Broken and Contrite Heart, I published in 2010, answers the question, “What do I do when I keep falling into the same sin? Does God hate me because I keep failing to get this write? So, where do I begin again and find joy in my salvation; after, falling. If you want to know more about this book or the other books I have written: You can find a link at: Book Resources.
©Effie Darlene Barba, 2017
Disclosure of Material Connection: I have not received any compensation for writing this post. I have no material connection to the brands, products, or services that I have mentioned except for my own books. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.
Photo by Patrick Hendry on Unsplash The inscription I added.