There was a time when I questioned, “Why, Lord?” Why did Mom suffer so from her bipolar disease? What could have been the purpose of Pete’s suffering? To the world, it appeared that this horrid disease won. But you see, it did not. What if every sorrow, tear, or pain leads to one finding eternal rest in the arms of a Sovereign God of love. Then, wasn’t it worth every sorrow, tear, or pain traversed along this road of life? God knows each heart, willingly bore our pain and sorrows as well.
A Sovereign God of Love Wept
The shortest verse in the Bible is “Jesus Wept” (John 11:35). So, often we hear preachers teach that therein Jesus wept over the death of his friend Lazarus. And that He wept because He felt the sorrow of all of those around Him. Yet, as Ken Davis pointed out in “It’s Enough to Make A Grown Man Cry”, Jesus knew that He would raise Lazarus from the dead. Therefore, He wept because His disciples could not see the full truth. He, the Sovereign God of Love, was and is eternal life to all who believe. We can trust fully and rest in that truth. Every detail of our life, He is in control and only He can see the final portrait.
Each tear we shed. The fears, sorrows, and pains we face. He is using each thread to form a tapestry of great beauty-a portrait of God’s only son. A Sovereign God of Love knows precisely what is needed to transform each heart into one that can fully trust in and rejoice in Him for all of eternity. This life is but a blink in time compared to eternity. Jesus wept because His friends and disciples could not fully comprehend the truth: they could rest and find joy even in their sorrow. Because the Sovereign God of love was and is still on His throne. Oh, how it must pain God each time I anxiously wonder in fear asking, “Why, Lord?” instead of trusting Him. I am certain that Jesus has wept each time I doubted His plan.
A Lesson from God in a Bipolar World
Mom’s illness prepared me to be Pedro Barba’s wife. God miraculously used those years I lived with Pete to bring Him to a saving knowledge of Jesus Christ. I say miraculously because as I see it, I failed so often; but, God used me anyway despite my weakness and frailty. Not that He needed me; but, that He graciously gave me the opportunity to be one of the vessels He used to bring Pete to Himself. Every thread of my life, mom’s life, and Pete’s pointing to a sovereign God of love, who knew our hearts. Which brings me to rejoice in Him. The greatest way I can demonstrate my love toward Him is to trust Him every day, no matter what comes. I can fully trust in His plans. He only wants what is best for me. My darkest valleys only bring me closer to Him.
When all the world enwraps me in darkness, He is my light. He gives to me His Abiding, Steadfast Joy to walk through my hardest trials. Then, I can proclaim as David.
PSALM 139
O lord, thou hast searched me, and known me.
2 Thou knowest my downsitting and mine uprising, thou understandest my thought afar off.
3 Thou compassest my path and my lying down, and art acquainted with all my ways.
4 For there is not a word in my tongue, but, lo, O Lord, thou knowest it altogether.
5 Thou hast beset me behind and before, and laid thine hand upon me.
6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; it is high, I cannot attain unto it.
7 Whither shall I go from thy spirit? or whither shall I flee from thy presence?
8 If I ascend up into heaven, thou art there: if I make my bed in hell, behold, thou art there.
9 If I take the wings of the morning, and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea;
10 Even there shall thy hand lead me, and thy right hand shall hold me.
11 If I say, Surely the darkness shall cover me; even the night shall be light about me.
12 Yea, the darkness hideth not from thee; but the night shineth as the day: the darkness and the light are both alike to thee.
13 For thou hast possessed my reins: thou hast covered me in my mother’s womb.
14 I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well.
15 My substance was not hid from thee, when I was made in secret, and curiously wrought in the lowest parts of the earth.
And Then Proclaim:
16 Thine eyes did see my substance, yet being unperfect; and in thy book all my members were written, which in continuance were fashioned, when as yet there was none of them.
17 How precious also are thy thoughts unto me, O God! how great is the sum of them!
18 If I should count them, they are more in number than the sand: when I awake, I am still with thee…
23 Search me, O God, and know my heart: try me, and know my thoughts:
24 And see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.
Whatever it takes Lord, help me to see you clearer each day. Make me into a reflection of You. Oh, Sovereign God of love, empty me of myself, that I might be a life saving vessel to a world in need of You.
DO YOU KNOW CHRIST AS YOUR SAVIOR?
If you don’t know Jesus Christ as your Savior: I urge you to go to my page titled How to Be Saved by clicking on this link. Because there is nothing more important than this, I urge you to seek Him today.
ARE YOU IN OF NEED PRAYER?
If you have a prayer request email me by clicking here
Or if you would like to tell me your story or thoughts comment here
For previous posts regarding God’s love
How to Love God with All Your Heart
A Sovereign God, A lump of Clay, and Grace that Amazes Me
How to See Life Through Eyes of Faith Like Joseph
Out of the Whirlwind of Life, Where is Faith Found?
How to Have the Faith and Commitment to Finish Well
Or for poetry
Out of the Darkness, I hear Your Love Song
Do You Want to Know the Secret to Abiding Steadfast Joy?
A labor of love, this book provides you with 3 foundations of truth from the scripture which once known will provide you with abiding, steadfast joy. Undaunted by the storms of life; your joy will overflow.
WHEN INJUSTICE AND VIOLENCE REIGN:
Through a study of Nahum, Habukkuk, and Zephaniah; I brought their message into our modern times. Answering the questions of “Why, God?”
Providing a foundation of faith and hope; even, as we see so much evil in the world and in our nation. With so much sorrow and despair, this book I wrote to guide you into discovering God’s Perfect Plan of love; amid this chaotic world filled with life’s storms.
You may click on the picture for more information on either of these books.
ANOTHER Book Available
You can find this and all my books on Amazon.com, search Effie Darlene Barba or click this link to be taken there
OTHER RESOURCES AVAILABLE
If you want to know more about other books I have written: You can read more about each one at: Book Resources.
Or for inspirational photos or home decor click here.
©Effie Darlene Barba, 2018
Disclosure of Material Connection: I have not received any compensation for writing this post. I have no material connection to the brands, products, or services that I have mentioned except for my own books. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.
Footnotes and Credits
The Inscription I added. The Photo used is by Osman Rana on Unsplash