We looked at how “the name of the Lord is our strong tower, the righteous run to it and are safe” Proverbs 18:10. Yet, there was one other concept we did not fully explore and that is “friend”. Some would object to our referring to God as our friend, as though that might cheapen the idea of His authority over us. But let me explain from scripture why I believe we are to call Him friend and we are to be a friend of Jesus. This can only be true if we consider Him the wise, all knowing friend, whom we feel so honored to know. Could it be possible that we are His chosen children and not also be His friend?
If we find the concept of God as friend foreign to our thinking, then perhaps we do not fully comprehend the idea of a true friend. A true friend desires and seeks the best of their friend, is willing to be honest even if it hurts, and are willing to lay down their life to save their friend. Furthermore, they so desire that others might see you as they do, someone worthy to be cherished and adored. Do you know have any friends like that? Are you that kind of friend? Or particularly are you that kind of friend to Jesus?
Proverbs 18:24 reads in the amplified version:
The man of too many friends [chosen indiscriminately] will be broken in pieces and come to ruin, But there is a [true, loving] friend who [is reliable and] sticks closer than a brother.
This verse in King James Version reads: “24 A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly: and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother.”
At first, I had a little trouble understanding the meaning. There seemed to be such a conflict between the versions. Yet, somehow, I believe God had a hand in allowing the confusion in these separate translations. After all is it not true that to have true friends, one must learn how to be a true friend. Yet, there is the problem that all too often we are so flippant in our use of the term friend. If every acquaintance is called friend, then have we cheapened the very idea of the word friend. Even with that, I wanted to search for the true meaning of this verse. Therefore, I researched the verse from its original (with a little help from both John McArthur, Jerry Falwell, and the NET all of which explain the original text says “a man of many friends comes to ruin”.
John McArthur study bible comments regarding this text:
must himself be friendly. The best text says “may come to ruin” (see translators’ note) and warns that the person who makes friends too easily and indiscriminately does so to his own destruction. On the other hand, a friend chosen wisely is more loyal than a brother. Friend. This is a strong word meaning “one who loves” and was used of Abraham, God’s friend (2 Chr. 20:7; Is. 41:8; cf. 1 Sam. 18:1; 2 Sam. 1:26).
A Friend of God
22 Seest thou how faith wrought with his works, and by works was faith made perfect? 23 And the scripture was fulfilled which saith, Abraham believed God, and it was imputed unto him for righteousness: and he was called the Friend of God. 24 Ye see then how that by works a man is justified, and not by faith only (James 2).
So, does that mean we have to work and always get everything right to be called God’s friend? There seems to be a confusion of words by James here; but not really. So lets look a little closer.
Look at how this was put together—Abraham trusted God enough to do what He was commanded to do—at least nearing the end of His life. Willingly, he took his son Isaac to sacrifice on the altar; believing God had a plan of redemption and trusting God with all his heart, soul, and spirit. So, faith brings about works. Abraham did not have that kind of faith, always. But he had grown to know God’s heart, His faithfulness, and to obey Him no matter what. Faith is knowing God is Almighty, Sovereign, Lord and He rewards all who diligently seek Him (Hebrews 11:6).
As we grow in faith, our life should reflect our faith by our actions and our desire to do as God commands. Our heart break into pieces whenever our actions dishonor God or show we do not trust Him.
Jesus said of Being a Friend
4 “And I say to you, My friends, do not be afraid of those who kill the body, and after that have no more that they can do. 5 But I will show you whom you should fear: Fear Him who, after He has killed, has power to cast into hell; yes, I say to you, fear Him! Luke 12
Jesus had no problem referring to us as friends. But whom did He call friends?
13 Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one’s life for his friends. 14 You are My friends if you do whatever I command you. 15 No longer do I call you servants, for a servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all things that I heard from My Father I have made known to you. John 15:
What are the characteristics of a true Friend? Are they not precisely what Jesus has presented to us?
Loyalty
Even after Peter had betrayed Him, Jesus commanded them tell Peter that He was resurrected and later we see Jesus on the shore preparing breakfast for Peter and the apostles. Then, quietly away from the others He takes a walk with Peter to restore Him and to so gently help Him to find His next right step in this life.
Sensitivity (tenderness):
How gently did our Savior speak to the woman at the well? Or Mary Magdalene, when caught in adultery or as she wept over His feet and anointed them with her most precious earthly possession.
Honesty:
You must be born again! (As He spoke to Nicodemus. Or seeing the heart of the rich young ruler, He asked him to go and sell all that he had to give to the poor. Knowing that the young man’s love of riches exceeded his desire for God. We are told in Mark 10 21 Then Jesus beholding him loved him, and said unto him, One thing thou lackest:”
Oh, do we not long to know what it is that we lack? As a true friend, do we not desire that God tell us exactly what we need to be closely held in His love? His Joy? How could He not tell us when our counterfeit joys are leading us away from sweet fellowship with Him?
Proverbs 27:
5 Open rebuke is better than secret love.
6 Faithful are the wounds of a friend; but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful.
7 The full soul loatheth an honeycomb; but to the hungry soul every bitter thing is sweet.
A true friend is not afraid to tell you the truth, even if it may offend at first You see true love and friendship cannot tell someone a lie concerning their eternity, even if that means they walk away, as did the rich young ruler.
Consistency:
Present in the good and the bad times.
I Kings 2:
Now the days of David drew nigh that he should die; and he charged Solomon his son, saying,
2 I go the way of all the earth: be thou strong therefore, and shew thyself a man;
3 And keep the charge of the Lord thy God, to walk in his ways, to keep his statutes, and his commandments, and his judgments, and his testimonies, as it is written in the law of Moses, that thou mayest prosper in all that thou doest, and whithersoever thou turnest thyself:
4 That the Lord may continue his word which he spake concerning me, saying, If thy children take heed to their way, to walk before me in truth with all their heart and with all their soul, there shall not fail thee (said he) a man on the throne of Israel.
Forgiveness
A true friend forgives, I mean truly forgives. We should forgive others as Jesus forgave us. He who cast our sins as far as the east is from the west, never to be spoken of again. He meets me right where I am; but never leaves there. Instead, He lifts higher than I could ever hope to be. Love covers a million trespasses; that is true love. Oh, it does forgive and forget; but, also guides that the beloved may shine forth in goodness, righteousness and holiness as they can be guided to do with God’s hand guiding them.
Only He can pull them out of the mires and storms of this world into newness of life in Him. As we forgive our friends, we must also point them to Him.
Concluding thought:
With Jesus as our true friend, how can we not prove ourselves to be His true friend. Reflecting Him to all the world, that they might come to know Him.
“Arise [from spiritual depression to a new life], shine [be radiant with the glory and brilliance of the Lord]; for your light has come,
And the glory and brilliance of the Lord has risen upon you. Isaiah 60:1 (AMP)
DO YOU KNOW CHRIST AS YOUR SAVIOR AND LORD?
If you don’t know Jesus Christ as your Savior and Lord: I urge you to go to my page titled How to Be Saved by clicking on this link. There is nothing more important than this; because He is the way, the truth and the life. Therefore, I urge you to seek Him today.
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©Effie Darlene Barba, 2020
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