Sometimes in this life we withdraw into a cocoon like shell where we will find it to be dark and lonely. Particularly we do that when we have had our hearts broken one too many times. For many years of my life, I believed the lie that if God really loved me; He would give me only beautiful things. Perhaps like a caterpillar consuming all that would fulfill my heart. God so graciously sent me the love of my life, Pedro Barba. Yet, as human loves go
he was a broken vessel as well. There were many sorrows and tears along the journey; yet, love stood firm. There is where I began to learn of God’s unconditional love for broken vessels such as I and Pete. Then, one day God took Pete home. I struggled and hoped to rediscover human love; but, on that journey I found only sorrow and pain. I withdrew into a cocoon like shell. Yet, in the darkness there God’s gracious hand wrought a miracle of transformation. When I finally emerged, I was filled with the strength of God’s love and the freedom to love without needing. This poem is that story of God’s Grace to transform a selfish needy heart to one that can see and love beauty freely with no need to capture it in my hands or to own it.
The Song of a Butterfly
By Effie Darlene Barba
A little girl had called Your name
Began to feast upon Your word
And like a caterpillar came
To cherish comfort, truth was blurred
I thought that if I did what’s right
You’d give me all my heart’s delight
Had I forgotten that it was Grace
That had saved a worm such as I
Within my heart pride took its place
Then I believed as truth the lie
That if You loved me as Your dear
You’d only fill my life with cheer
Above all else my one desire
To find the one who’d love me true
Enduring all I flamed that fire
And there He was, a gift from You
A human heart with broken soul
The pain of which did take its toll
Yet, willing heart my love stood firm
I bade you Lord to give me strength
Your love for me you did affirm
Unveiling all its depth and length
And then You took my earthly love
To be with you- Your home above
My sorrow came like bitter rain
I searched for love again to find
Attempts to love I did but feign
Until to loneliness resigned
I cannot tell you now the why
Despite Your love I still did cry
With Broken Heart-I drew within
And built a hard cocoon like shell
How was it that I thought therein?
I’d safe from pain and sorrow dwell
There within the dark cold wall
I heard God’s voice, I heard You call
In darkness there I felt Your Grace
I struggled, Lord your will to see
And there I saw Your love filled face
This gave me strength to then break free
So there I’d sealed myself to die
And now emerged a butterfly
Oh wondrous Joy I know is mine
And Love abounding in this heart
Your Mercy, Grace and Glory Shine
Upon my life You did impart
The broken moments You did will
That I might fly above the hill
And now, Dear God; Your love in me
No longer wrought with fear or need
This heart of mine has been set free
To pour forth love in word and deed
To those I meet along this way
And fly with joy in You today.
“The Lord is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart; and saveth such as be of a contrite spirit” (Psalm 34:18)
The picture above is used with permission of Sarah Barba. For copies please go to http://fineartamerica.com/featured/i-see-you-sarah-barba.html where you can purchase copies.
The artist that drew the picture “A Broken and Contrite Heart” featured on my header and who designed my logo is Ronald Barba. Feel free to email me at Artedabarba@gmail.com or purchase his art at http://fineartamerica.com/art/all/ronald+barba/all
Disclosure of Material Connection: I have not received any compensation for writing this post. I have no material connection to the brands, products, or services that I have mentioned. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: "Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.