Mercy Archives ⋆ Effie Darlene Barba

Can I Look in The Mirror and Still Feel Loved?

I will praise thee, O Lord, among the people: and I will sing praises unto thee among the nations For thy mercy is great above the heavens: and thy truth reacheth unto the clouds. Be thou exalted, O God, above the heavens: and thy glory above all the earth; That thy beloved may be delivered: save with thy right hand, and answer me. Psalm 108:3-6

As I sat and stared at an empty page this morning, I prayed. Prayer is my only hope. From the time I post the previous post to the moment I begin the next, my mind is prayerfully searching to know where to turn and what to write. That is sometimes easier when I am doing a series through any book of the Bible; because, then I must focus on God’s word and from that wait for God to guide my understanding through commentaries, prayerful searching and even listening to sermons. Certainly, at work I must focus on work; yet, as I walk the halls between tasks, I sometimes hear a word, a thought that inspires my understanding of the scripture at hand. That is Grace.

When I finished the series on the gospel of John in mid-February, I felt compelled to begin a series about love. Before I started the series, I questioned God in earnest as to why this series. Yet, the longer I questioned; the stronger the conviction came. As I have opened up to each of you all my own failures along this road toward discovering the truth of love, I have at times felt very vulnerable and very frail. As always, God has been faithful to reveal to this weary heart His Grace each step of the way. Along this journey of writing the story of my life, God has revealed to me truths about me as well. Truths as shunned to know as I have been forced to look deep into the mirror of my own life, my own heart. When there was a time it would have been easier to just blame Miguel, Pete, Terry or even Mom for their role in breaking my heart; now, I couldn’t.

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What Do You Do When You Get It All Wrong?

I awoke this morning with these ideas circling in my head. As I began to write down some of the thoughts; I realized that I needed to share these with you today. So, I filmed this video for you.

4 points to remember when you get it all wrong

1. It is not about how many times I have failed God. It is about how many times that God’s loving Grace has searched for me, found me buried in despair, and asked “Child, do you love me?” “Yes, my Lord, with all my heart!!”, I reply. “Then my Child, come take my hand. We have work to do. The fields are white with harvest. Feed my sheep.”

2. It is not about how many times Satan has sifted me and left me like dust on the board of life. It is about how many times God takes that pulverized flour and makes bread to feed those who are hungry.

3. It is not about how many dreams I have toward doing things for God—no matter how lofty they might be. It is about how many times God picks up the shattered pieces of those dreams, then reflects His Glory through them to shine His light upon another soul. Changing the eternity of another through the shatter pieces of what once was my dreams.

4. It is not about what I can do for God. It is about what He can do with a broken heart, and feeble weary hands when that heart has come to realize that He is my greatest treasure. He is my Joy, my hope, and the love I have so longed for.

So, dear friend; if you think that God can not use you to shine forth His Glory. Think again. He loves you and His mercy is new every morning. I needed to tell you that today.

I wrote and published my book A Broken and Contrite Heart in 2011 which was an in depth look at what do you do when you get it wrong. Although, I have grown spiritually since it’s publication; it remains a good place to begin or continue your journey of Grace. Whenever, I forget (as sometimes we humans do); I have to return to that place in which I realized that it has always been all about Grace and Grace Alone.

If you wish to purchase a copy, you may click the link or go to Amazon.com or BarnesandNobles.com to order one.

If indeed, you wish a copy and cannot afford it; please email me. Depending upon the response, I will try to honor you with a copy. Understanding that in the modern book market; I, the author, must purchase my own books from the publisher. So, as I am able and God permits, I will try to fulfill those requests.

©Effie Darlene Barba, 2016

Disclosure of Material Connection: I have not received any compensation for writing this post. I have no material connection to the brands, products, or services that I have mentioned with of course the exception of my own book for which I receive a small commission from Authorhouse, the publisher. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.

TO GOD-MY LOVE, MY HOPE, MY JOY

“I Am the man that hath seen affliction by the rod of his wrath. He hath led me, and brought me into darkness…..¹⁸And I said, My strength and my hope is perished from the Lord: Remembering mine affliction and my misery, the wormwood and the gall. My soul hath them still in remembrance, and is humbled in me.This I recall to my mind, therefore have I hope.It is of the Lord’s mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness. The Lord is my portion, saith my soul; therefore will I hope in him.” (Lamentations 3)

This journey at times may seem filled with sorrow, afflictions or heartache; yet, the one thing that is certain is God’s faithfulness, His love, and His mercy to all who humbly turn to seek His face. In the midst of the sorrow, He brings us His joy, His love and His hope for each new day dawning. We must only open our eyes to see Glory.

TO GOD-MY LOVE, MY HOPE, MY JOY

by Effie Darlene Barba

My life-so filled with hopes and dreams

Lay shattered at Your feet

So many tears, so many pains

I laid before Thy seat

Can I look upon Your face of love

And question what You’ve done?

For You have been my only hope

My only morning sun

You’ve seen my heart when crushed with pain

Your hands have held it tight

When I have been so weak, so frail

You’ve shown Your strength, Your might

You’ve held me close within Your arms

When darkness filled my night

And when I could not see my way

Your eyes, they gave me sight

I lay my life within Your hands

That You may heal my soul

And keep my eyes upon You Lord

That I may reach Your goal

Shine forth Thy grace, Thy mercy Lord

And let me be Thy light

That all may see Your eyes of love

The blind, they might have sight

Let not the sorrows, nor the pains

Bring bitterness within

And give me strength to walk this path

Protect my heart from sin

I lay my heart, my soul, my dreams

Before Thy throne of love

I lift my eyes to You, My God

And seek Your will above

Thou art the only one I need

To fill my heart with glee

It is Your face, my one true love

Tis all I need to see

So lift me up and hold me close

Reveal Thy love divine

That through the holes within my heart

A world might see You shine

And if the sorrows of my past

Can touch a wayward one

I thank you Lord for each dark path

That lead them to Your son

I praise You now from mountains high

For each dark path I’ve trod

Twas there I found Your heart, Your love

Twas there I found You God

What great and wondrous joy I know

Because You are my king

And though the path I cannot see

My heart will trust and sing

A song of praise unto You Lord

Who knows what’s best for me

You’ll hold my hand and lead me on

In darkness, I can see

Your love, Your help, Your guiding hand

Is all I’ll ever need

So hold me close unto Your path

For this is all I plead

I’ll skip with joy along this path

Though darkness may surround

Because I know You hold my hand

My feet will e’er touch ground

I cannot fall outside Your love

I cannot lose my way

I’ll hold my broken dreams once more

And see them real, one day

A song of praise unto You Lord

Who knows what’s best for me

You’ll hold my hand and lead me on

In darkness, I can see

Your love, Your help, Your guiding hand

Is all I’ll ever need

So hold me close unto Your path

For this is all I plead

Disclosure of Material Connection: I have not received any compensation for writing this post. I have no material connection to the brands, products, or services that I have mentioned. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: "Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.

Why Are We So Quick To Stone Someone’s Life?

I was 25 when my husband first moved us to Mexico. For me it was a new language and a new culture to learn. I did not realize that because of many of our movies and TV shows, the upper class had some preconceived ideas of we from North of the border. Over the years, I learned to dearly love the Mexican people as I saw their persevering hearts, courage, and their grateful attitudes. But, let’s go back to the beginning. As a young, blonde American girl with a limited Spanish vocabulary; I found I was accepted well among those in the market, the corner store and the taco stand. However, the socially elite women shunned me. They would grab their husband’s arms if anyone tried to introduce me to them. Which leads me to our story.

One night, my husband wanted me to join him with his friends. We left his mother to watch the baby and with some hesitance of heart I went. As the evening went on, my husband had consumed a little too much alcohol. I understood very little of the conversations surrounding me as we had ended up on the balcony of a small restaurant. The balcony was narrow with only one set of stairs to leave by and we were near the back, farthest from the exit. Two tables from us were a group of men who were smoking. Since there was no ashtray on their table they were flicking their cigarettes onto the carpet. I watched as the embers would fall and even slightly flame before dying out. Disgusted and a little concerned we might be trapped behind a wall of blaze; I picked up an ashtray and sat it on their table. Then I turned around to return to my seat when suddenly my husband seemed enraged. He ordered me angrily to leave immediately. Confused, in high heels I found myself walking all alone down the dark streets of Pachuca at midnight.

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What Happens When The Light Of The World Shows Mercy?

The feast of the tabernacles had ended and the Pharisees were frustrated that they had not found a way to “condemn” Jesus. Nicodemus had even suggested they had no cause; but, they found the words of Jesus offensive. How dare He suggest they did not understand the scripture! His words cut deep into their pride. They had spent a lifetime studying the scripture and working very hard to live an exemplary life. Surely, God would recognize all their goodness and their reward would be great. Still, this man from “Galilee” cut at their pride with His words. How dare He do that! They had gone away to their own homes while Jesus went to the Mount of Olives. We know that was where He often retreated at night to pray. As Jesus returned to teach, the scribes and Pharisees came with a plan to entrap Him by presenting Him a case of “law.”

GUILTY, CAUGHT IN THE ACT

“³Then the scribes and Pharisees brought to Him a woman caught in adultery. And when they had set her in the midst, ⁴they said to Him, “Teacher, this woman was caught^[b] in adultery, in the very act. ⁵Now Moses, in the law, commanded^[c] us that such should be stoned.^[d] But what do You say?”^[e](John 8 NKJV). Christ bent down and started to write on the ground. What was He writing? We are not told. Perhaps, He was writing the actual law. ““If a man commits adultery with another man’s wife, both the man and woman shall be put to death” (Leviticus 20:10 TLB). In this case, where is the man? They had brought the woman; but clearly, something was wrong with this picture. Being “caught in the act” meant they knew the man as well; yet, only brought the woman. Why? We are not told. Had one of these men entrapped her himself? Was she guilty? Most likely, as we see from the conversation Jesus has with her later; but, for this moment she was about to meet light, truth and be given grace. Jesus knew their hearts and also knew the heart of this woman.