Tag: God’s Sovereignty

Can Love Really Endure All Things, Clinging To Hope?

For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts. Isaiah 55:8-9

What happens when you become the person you swore never to become!! For Pete that day came too quickly. Our marriage had its ups and downs from the beginning. The little girl who hated conflict trying always to please. The little boy always afraid of becoming vulnerable if he showed love. Both of us filled with our own fears, dreams, and baggage.

Pete dreamed big. Would invest all his hopes in a new job, new adventure. He would pour all of his heart into that. Always there would arise some conflict, some difficulty and then he would fall into near despair. Out of the perceived ashes of that job, he would determine that we would move. Life would be better just around the corner. We began a journey of moving about every 6 to 8 months. A bit unusual for a doctor in that time period.

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Ready to leave for Mexico–March 1980.

One of those moves came right after Alberto was born. This time we were moving to Mexico. We had packed up our trucks and traveled from Florida to the Brownsville border. Pete’s father had come to meet us there. Pete needed his help to make the final arrangements to get our stuff moved to Pachuca. That afternoon, Pete slapped me. Stunned, I stepped back and withdrew into silent despair. He looked with horror. Then he burst into tears; swearing he would never do that again.

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3 Truths of Hope to a Weary Heart

What an incredible weekend!! Saturday, I was exhausted and all the good intentions to clean house, do the yard, and work on editing quickly turned into resting, listening to sermons, and pretty much doing none of the planned activities. At first, I was a bit frustrated with myself; then, I realized God did command us to rest and He had shut down my brain for a day for a reason.  I too often do the same thing in my Christian life, I try to work to please God.  He usually has to shut me down for a day so I can refocus and let Him work through me.  Sunday, I posted a poem from the archives, went to 8 am service at The Crossing, sat with Lindsey a while, and then left to visit another church downtown. I had promised a friend I would visit; although, the friend wasn’t there when I arrived. At this second church, a lady made her way over and sat beside me. She had been widowed only a few months, the weight of which showed in her eyes. At moments, I could see the tears rise as she tried to hold them back. By the end of the service, I knew I had found a new friend and I would be returning to visit.  I have learned that there are no accidents or coincidences in my life; God, uses it all to accomplish His purpose in His timing.

God Knows

 

Then yesterday evening I met with a small group from my church. It was the initial meeting with this small group that I would be joining to study the bible with. When I had first received the invitation and noted that the group was couples, I had wondered why God chose a couples group since I have been alone for such a long time as a widow. I was a bit afraid that the awkward ache of “loneliness” would creep back in. It had been a long time since I had allowed myself to think that or to desire anything else beyond the quiet aloneness that I have with God. [bctt tweet=”Had my heart really been healed? Or would the scars of a broken heart rip open to bleed once more?”] I have yet to see for certain. Still, this I know.

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Can My Heart Ever Really See God’s Wondrous Glory?

Can My Heart Ever Really See God’s Wondrous Glory?

This journey of life has taken me through dark and treacherous valleys at times. So, often I have searched to find the heart of God; desiring to know and understand His will. Sorrows, pains, trials come and toss me about on this sea of life. Each time I am tossed by the storms,  I find myself trusting more firmly in the only anchor that can hold me fast in the midst of the storms. I find myself searching and seeking to know God more. I search to see His Glory, His Love, and His Joy. I find that out of the darkness: I become filled with Joy in the midst of sorrow, love in the midst of broken heartedness, and that hope arises out of despair. It is in those dark valleys that God’s Glory shines brightest. Quite the opposite of what my heart would have thought it desired. I really would prefer that His Glory present itself toward me in prosperity. Yet, in my own humanity; my thoughts turn away from God and toward me when all is going well. As though an all righteous, just God would be so pleased with my own accomplishments of righteousness. Yet, God’s Glorious attributes include His perfect Love as well as His perfect Justice.  Both are blended into His Splendor.  He knows what is best for me.  He knows all that is needed in my heart to prepare me for the greatest pleasure in Him and in His Glory.

 

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[bctt tweet=”God knows the only hope for my heart to see glimpses His Glory in a broken world is to allow storms”] Could I understand His power and might were it not for the storms in my life?  Would I even search for God, were there no storms?  God’s heart breaks with mine every time mine is broken. Yet, He knows that unless mine is broken; I can never feel the depth of His love. I would never be able to truly love anything or anyone; had my heart never been broken.  In that broken state, I found God’s love which filled me to overflowing.  Only then could I learn the truth of love.  If I had never known sorrow; could I really know the depth of Joy I have found in God?

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