fear of failure Archives ⋆ Effie Darlene Barba

What Have You to Fear, Oh Heart of Mine?

Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness. For I the Lord thy God will hold thy right hand, saying unto thee, Fear not; I will help thee. Isaiah 41: 10,13

Fear can be that sudden sense of panic with its heightened awareness allowing us to flee danger or it can come as a deep seated dread-a weariness of soul and spirit. In this world there are many things which attack our hearts with fear. It may be a fear that we will make the wrong decision concerning a job, the fear of failure, the fear of loneliness, fear of financial distress, fearfulness for a child, illness, or fear of the unknown. We know that there are unexpected storms. We know that we live within a world where evil happens-from pipe bombs to terror. As Christians we are certainly not exempt for such evil. Indeed, we may even be the target. We lock our doors, build walls around our hearts, and prepare to stand firm against whatever force comes. Yet, there is one fear; I daresay is the one that can destroy us faster than any other. That one we cannot build walls against, no barriers can keep it out; because, it is buried within our own heart and mind. Continue reading “What Have You to Fear, Oh Heart of Mine?”

What to Do When Feeling Alone, Afraid, And Ashamed

Simon Peter, a servant and an apostle of Jesus Christ, to them that have obtained like precious faith with us through the righteousness of God and our Savior Jesus Christ: Grace and peace be multiplied unto you through the knowledge of God, and of Jesus our Lord ,According as his divine power hath given unto us all things that pertain unto life and godliness, through the knowledge of him that hath called us to glory and virtue: Whereby are given unto us exceeding great and precious promises: that by these ye might be partakers of the divine nature, having escaped the corruption that is in the world through lust. 2 Peter 1:1-4

In the quiet moments alone, do you ever look back over your life and cry? Have you ever felt misunderstood? With a heart full of love, you so wanted to do or say the right thing; but, every word seemed to be misinterpreted and in the end you feel alone and rejected. At the end of the day you end up with so many “would haves”, “could haves”, or “should haves.” Maybe, it has to do with a diet you failed again. Maybe, it had to do with a financial decision you now regret. Whatever the reason, have you ever come to the end of the day and wondered if there is any purpose for you? Have you ever wondered whether any of it matters? Your joy is gone, your hope is gone and your only prayer is that when the morning breaks, peace and joy will have returned. Yet, your sorrow is worse because you feel that you have failed God once more. You hope that “knowledge that you are loved” will once more fill your heart with song, if only you could feel that again. So what do you do?

My time in Springfield was a time to heal the brokenness inside. Beyond having met and known new friends who accepted me as I was; there was also the time alone to reflect upon my life. It actually was when I first began to write about my life. Writing was a way that I could reflect and writing pushed me even further to search the scripture to discover the promises of God. Promises that could restore my heart whenever I felt broken, lonely, unloved, and unworthy. Too often, I would find myself in that state at the end of the day. Yet, it was those feelings that drove me to the scriptures even more and drove me to my knees a lot. One scripture that can restore hope in those times is this one from 2 Peter.

Continue reading “What to Do When Feeling Alone, Afraid, And Ashamed”

How to Actually Conquer Your Fear of Inadequacy

Sometime in 2005 the desire to be an orator for God began. It was about the same time that I was drawn to writing “A Broken and Contrite Heart.” I began to study, pray, and journal as I prepared to write this book. Occasional words of poetry began to be also in my journal. Still there was another voice inside that paralyzed me from continuing, “Why would God choose me to speak or write? I had speech therapy as a child and I still sometimes stutter when I get nervous. I don’t have any special talent like comedy or singing to draw the people. I am just me. If the people look deep and discover how often I have failed in this Christian walk, the times I have been filled with trembling fear, or lost my way because of jealousy-anger; they might condemn me. Instead of helping God, I might just mess things up. Why would anyone want to hear my story?” Still, deep within me a soft voice pushed me forward.

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JUST TELL YOUR STORY

Then, I heard David Ring say, “If you want to make an impact for Christ, just tell your story.” So, I began; but only intermittently until emergency surgery forced me to sit down for two months. I had to smile, as I told God, “I guess I have run out of excuses. I will finish the book now.” I did and I published it later that year. My hesitation had been my own fear of inadequacy. I was so afraid that I might fail God in what I wrote. Or worse, if I let people too close and they see my scars will God be embarrassed of me. Sound familiar? It is the story of almost every one of God’s Biblical Heroes of Faith. God was so kind that in each of their stories, He included all the blemishes and all the failures in the narratives of their stories. Yet, in Hebrews 11; they still were the heroes. That is God’s amazing Grace and love. He chooses ordinary people (like me) to do His extraordinary work.

Continue reading “How to Actually Conquer Your Fear of Inadequacy”