Tag: faith

How Is Patience a Wonderful Demonstration of Love?

They that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint. (Isaiah 40:30) Wait on the Lord: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the Lord. (Psalm 27:14) Love is patient; love is kind (I Corinthians 13:4 NIV)

So, often in our Christian walk, God bids us to wait upon Him. There are promises throughout scripture for strength, victory, peace and even joy as we learn to wait upon God in the midst of any circumstance. There was a time that I would have said, “God, please let me just skip this lesson on patience. It is not one that I am going to ever learn, so can we move on to something else?” Yet, God knew that this was a lesson which is vital to both my faith and my ability to love Him as I should. Patience while waiting is both an act of faith and an act of love toward God.

As I wrote in the last post, I arrived into Columbia with great anticipation of all that God was going to do. He had moved rapidly in preparing my move. Mountains were flattened and laid at my feet. After I arrived, there was the bitterest cold winter with snow fall after snow fall. Each day I would carefully, cautiously make my way safely to work in my car not made for snow. The short sale on my house in Florida had come to a standstill. The applications for a second job only ended in closed doors. For the first time in all of my career, I was being turned down for a job. Financially it was tough on a part time job. Certainly God knew this. So, I opted to have no cable, kept my house at the bare minimum of heating while wearing layers of clothes to keep warm, and did everything I could to survive financially. At the end of each month I rejoiced that I made it. I never failed to tithe and God would stretch the remainder of the money.

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Can I Truly Love Before I Know How to Be Loved?

I will love them freely (Hosea 14:4) Yea, I have loved thee with an everlasting love: therefore, with loving kindness have I drawn thee. (Jeremiah 31:3)

Where is the faith to sustain us when the bitter cold of winter strikes again deep into our valleys of life? We want so much to believe that because we obeyed God’s command that we deserve some great reward for our feeble act of valor! We so quickly lose sight of the truth that we are incapable of any act of faith had it not been for God’s great mercy and grace reaching down to enlighten our hearts to seek Him. At the end of so many heartbreaks, so many health struggles, so many surgeries, financial ruin, and so many trials; I kept waiting for my life to suddenly become restored like Job’s was. Hadn’t I been faithful to follow after God through many devastating trials? I had obeyed when He commanded I stay with Pete. I had obeyed when He bid me to go to Florida. I had obeyed when He asked me to leave Florida and return to Missouri. I knew that God had orchestrated it all; so now, I awaited His next command which I was certain would suddenly flourish me in all.

Yea, I have loved thee

When I pulled into Columbia with my big U-Haul truck and my car hitched onto the trailer behind, I rejoiced. God had been faithful to get me safely here through some areas of snow and ice. Alberto and several friends came to unload my truck and place all the boxes inside the new home Alberto had bought for me. That, in itself had been a humbling experience. Certainly I would be paying the mortgage; but along with the move, I had lost my home. I had markedly downsized my possessions. There was some sadness in the loss. Yet, they were only material possessions and mattered little in the scheme of eternity. It wasn’t the first time I had laid aside my home and possessions; yet, a part of me hoped it was the last. As a parent, I wanted to be the one who always gave to my children. This time, I was receiving. Emotionally that was very hard for me. Maybe, just maybe; that was what God knew about me. It was even hard for me to receive His gifts, His love, and His joy. A part of me needed to feel that I was the one giving to God—through sacrifice, through sorrow and through whatever feeble act of obedience.

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What Does Mustard Seed Faith Have to Do with Love?

 

Jesus said unto them… verily I say unto you, if ye have faith as a grain of mustard seed, ye shall say unto this mountain, remove hence to yonder place; and it shall remove; and nothing shall be impossible unto you. Matthew 17:20

I had packed my car full of everything I would need for the rehearsal dinner, along with my finest china and crystal to take to Alberto. As I left Florida for the two-day drive to Missouri, my heart was filled with excitement. I loved driving long trips because it was a time I could spend alone with God. I had audio books by John Piper and Jonathan Edwards to accompany me on the trip with lots of Christian music. Over several months I had felt a restlessness of spirit, I wasn’t certain as to its source. It was my prayer that God would reveal to me the reason for this restless dissatisfaction as we drove down the road together.

dmtag0014

The long hours at work while also providing for Mom were taking a toll on my health. Her mental illness with her constant depression had forced me to spend lots of money on private sitters; much more than I could afford. The house, like many people who purchased when I did; was upside down with its value now being 100,000.00 less than when I purchased it. Work, which had always been my solace; was changing. Those whom I trusted as my extended family had turned hostile toward me. All of my writing, my poetry, speaking, and my blog seemed to be futile; as I wondered did they matter. So, it was I looked forward to this time alone with God as we drove down the road.

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What Is the Second Greatest Enemy to Love?

Make me to go in the path of thy commandments; for therein do I delight. Incline my heart unto thy testimonies, and not to covetousness. Turn away mine eyes from beholding vanity; and quicken thou me in thy way. Psalm 119:35-37

As I have pointed out previously, anger is enemy number one of love. Our hearts are so quickly filled by anger so as to crush any hope of love. There is another enemy which can grow like a cancer within our hearts preventing any hope of feeling true love. That enemy is covetousness. Much like anger it begins with a thought or desire deep within our hearts and then grows until it destroys joy, love and hope. It is very subtle at the beginning. We may look at something and just for a moment desire that it was ours. We may see a couple in love and wish that was ours. We may see another who has a nicer home or car and wish it was ours. Someone may have a better position, better grades, greater success, better health, and the list goes on. Whatever it might be, a small seed of discontent starts within our heart which can grow rapidly creating doubt, fear, and depression; while at the same time choking out any signs of love within our feeble hearts. It is no wonder, “Do Not Covet” is one of the 10 commandments. (Exodus 20:17)

Faith

To covet is defined as to yearn to possess or have something. That can be anything!! Then when we don’t have it and we see someone else who does, we become jealous or envious. We wonder why “God loves them better. Why would they have that? Haven’t I been faithful?” If we look at the apostles, this too was evident within their hearts. They were always wanting to know who would be greater, sit closer to Jesus, or suffer less. Paul even spoke of his own struggles with coveting in Romans 7. So, how do we destroy the cancer of coveting; so, that we might know the joy of having hearts filled with love? Faith!! Faith is the key. Let me help you to understand this; as this is a lesson I too must often go back for a refresher course. A seed I often need to destroy before it takes root in my own heart.

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How to Actually Survive When Feeling Rejected and Lonely

 

‘I have chosen you and have not cast you away: Fear not, for I am with you; Be not dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, Yes, I will help you, I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.’ Isaiah 41:9-10 (NKJV)

Nothing cuts deeper into our hearts than feelings of rejection or loneliness. Our hearts yearn for love, acceptance, and companionship. We want validation that we matter. We want to know that, at least to someone; we have purpose and meaning. For some of us, rejection cuts at the very core of our being forcing us to come face to face with our own frailties and failures. If we are honest, I daresay that is true of most of us.

alone

As the fall of 2000 approached, my sons were off to college and I prepared to have major surgery once more. This time I was having my colon removed. Terry and I had begun to try to mend things. Maybe there would be a chance to piece together our relationship again. Then, Terry said he would drive me the 4 hours to the hospital for my surgery; but, then he was leaving for a hunting trip. So, it was there would be no one for the doctor to talk to after surgery. I was alone as I went into surgery that morning. I made the arrangements for my daughter to fly into St. Louis and take a taxi to the hospital 5 days later (estimating the day of my discharge). When we arrived at the hospital, we parked the car so I would know where it was. Terry became angry I wouldn’t let him take the car to meet up with his hunting buddy; but, he had left me stranded without my car once before. So I insisted he take a taxi to meet his friend.

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