Effie Darlene Barba

^{John 17: 20} “I do not pray for these alone, but also for those who will believe in Me through their word; ²¹ that they all may be one, as You, Father, are in Me, and I in You; that they also may be one in Us, that the world may believe that You sent Me. ²² And the glory which You gave Me I have given them, that they may be one just as We are one: ²³ I in them, and You in Me; that they may be made perfect in one, and that the world may know that You have sent Me, and have loved them as You have loved Me. ²⁴ “Father, I desire that they also whom You gave Me may be with Me where I am, that they may behold My glory which You have given Me; for You loved Me before the foundation of the world. ²⁵ O righteous Father! The world has not known You, but I have known You; and these have known that You sent Me. ²⁶ And I have declared to them Your name, and will declare it, that the love with which You loved Me may be in them, and I in them.”

 

Stop for just one moment and drink in all the beauty of this scripture, revel in it and savor every morsel of truth. 

First, note that this is  a prayer by Jesus Christ in the Garden of Gethsemane.   He is heading to the cross where He is about to take on all the guilt, the shame, and the punishment for my sin and yours.  God, who can not  look upon sin, will turn His back upon Him with a wrenching pain that we cannot even imagine.  He, who knew no sin, was on the road to Calvary to be  my sin bearer.  The King of Kings, the Lord of Lords in His most desperate moment of pain; knowing what He would face, prayed for me. My great high priest pleaded for me and continues to plead for me. 

More than that, look at this incredible prayer.  He asked that I might be united in Him and the Father in the same manner that He is united with the Father.  Think about this, united in Spirit and Communion with God just as Christ is—this is His plead for me?  Me with all my vain desires and stumbling of feet united as one with Christ – what a thought!!!  Beyond that He says “And the glory which You gave Me I have given them”  He has given me His glory?  When I gaze upon Him in all His Magnificent Glory—high and risen up- this Prince of all ages; it is nearly unimaginable that He shares that Glory with me.  Who am I that He who created the entire universe would love me so much.  He desires that I know and understand that  God loved me with that same love as He has for His Son.    There it is that is exactly what verse 23 says.  We still cannot grasp the full magnitude of this unless we fully behold His Glory and the depth of love the Father has for Him, so He even pleads that we may be given this vision.  Just as declared in II Corinthians 3:¹⁶ Nevertheless when one turns to the Lord, the veil is taken away. ¹⁷ Now the Lord is the Spirit; and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty. ¹⁸ But we all, with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as by the Spirit of the Lord. 

He is the one who removes that veil of blindness that this human  heart has and step by step reveals that Glory which is too great for me to even comprehend without the work of the Holy Spirit.  As He reveals the greatness of His Glory He sets about to transform me into that same image of Glory which is His so I might go forth and show forth to a dying world His Love, His Joy, His Hope, and His Glory.  How can I do any less than just that !!  The cares of this world fade to dimness in the light of His Glory.  Is there any hardship or pain to great to endure for this High Priest?  Is there any shore to distant to walk for Him?  He is right there with me each and every step of the way pleading for my understanding.  Whatever befalls my life, I will follow Him, my Shepherd and Savior.  The amazing thing is when standing in His presence those things that people consider as suffering no longer even feels burdensome.  His overwhelming Joy fills my heart and His perfect peace fills my soul driving out all sorrow and fear.  It is a very foolish thing indeed to not make seeking Him the number one priority of one’s life. 

My one question is “Do You Know and Believe in Him?”   This prayer was for all “those who will believe in Me (Christ)  through their word (the teaching of the disciples-The Bible)”  It is my earnest desire that if you do not know Him—seek Him. For those who do know Him, I desire that you understand the depth of these truths.  His love for me and You was never dependent on us; rather it is dependent on my great Savior, Friend, and High Priest—Jesus Christ.

 

                                                                                      Love, Effie Darlene Barba

^{Romans 5 1} Therefore, having been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, ² through whom also we have access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and rejoice in hope of the glory of God. ³ And not only that, but we also glory in tribulations, knowing that tribulation produces perseverance; ⁴ and perseverance, character; and character, hope. ⁵ Now hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out in our hearts by the Holy Spirit who was given to us.

Christ in Our Place

⁶ For when we were still without strength, in due time Christ died for the ungodly. ⁷ For scarcely for a righteous man will one die; yet perhaps for a good man someone would even dare to die. ⁸ But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. ⁹ Much more then, having now been justified by His blood, we shall be saved from wrath through Him. ¹⁰ For if when we were enemies we were reconciled to God through the death of His Son, much more, having been reconciled, we shall be saved by His life. ¹¹ And not only that, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received the reconciliation.

Death in Adam, Life in Christ

¹² Therefore, just as through one man sin entered the world, and death through sin, and thus death spread to all men, because all sinned— ¹³ (For until the law sin was in the world, but sin is not imputed when there is no law. ¹⁴ Nevertheless death reigned from Adam to Moses, even over those who had not sinned according to the likeness of the transgression of Adam, who is a type of Him who was to come. ¹⁵ But the free gift is not like the offense. For if by the one man’s offense many died, much more the grace of God and the gift by the grace of the one Man, Jesus Christ, abounded to many. ¹⁶ And the gift is not like that which came through the one who sinned. For the judgment which came from one offense resulted in condemnation, but the free gift which came from many offenses resulted in justification. ¹⁷ For if by the one man’s offense death reigned through the one, much more those who receive abundance of grace and of the gift of righteousness will reign in life through the One, Jesus Christ.)
¹⁸ Therefore, as through one man’s offense judgment came to all men, resulting in condemnation, even so through one Man’s righteous act the free gift came to all men, resulting in justification of life. ¹⁹ For as by one man’s disobedience many were made sinners, so also by one Man’s obedience many will be made righteous.
²⁰ Moreover the law entered that the offense might abound. But where sin abounded, grace abounded much more, ²¹ so that as sin reigned in death, even so grace might reign through righteousness to eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.

 

I have had several friends facing extreme sorrow lately and in my work I see devastating diagnosis with pain and suffering. Other friends are in situations that make them feel so unworthy as humans that they don’t know how to face themselves each day. Financially, each month I stand and wonder how can I meet all the financial obligations before me.  My heart bleeds for those in desperate need and I wonder if there is any time or resources left to reach out and help?  So wherein lies this hope that awakens me each morning and calls me to arise?  Where can faith live in the midst of all of this devastation in this world? 

Perhaps this is the key to this truth  As we read Romans 5 there are many truths that ring forth.  Our hope is not in or of this world.  Christ died that we might have His righteousness—the great exchange He took my sins and gave me His righteousness.  When we grasp the magnitude of this truth, our life is changed.  Our love for Him can’t help but grow that He becomes all that we seek and hope for.  He takes our sorrow and gives us His joy to spread forth to the world around us.  He takes our fears and gives us His peace.  He takes our guilt and gives us His love even for ourselves.  I am worthy because my name is written on His heart, my name is graven in His hands of love.  When Satan would try to destroy me with my own guilt, I must only stand firm in this grace that holds me tightly.  I have a great High Priest that always pleads for me before God.  All the cares of this world fade into nothingness in the presence of Christ’s love.  I want to share with you one of my favorite hymns written by Fanny Jane Crosby.  

Fanny Cros­by was prob­ab­ly the most pro­lif­ic hymn­ist in his­to­ry. Though blind­ed by an in­com­pe­tent doc­tor at six weeks of age, she wrote over 8,000 hymns. About her blind­ness, she said:

“It seemed in­tend­ed by the bless­ed prov­i­dence of God that I should be blind all my life, and I thank him for the dis­pen­sa­tion. If per­fect earth­ly sight were of­fered me to­mor­row I would not ac­cept it. I might not have sung hymns to the praise of God if I had been dis­tract­ed by the beau­ti­ful and in­ter­est­ing things about me”

 

All the way my Savior leads me,
What have I to ask beside?
Can I doubt His tender mercy,
Who through life has been my Guide?
Heav’nly peace, divinest comfort,
Here by faith in Him to dwell!
For I know, whate’er befall me,
Jesus doeth all things well;
For I know, whate’er befall me,
Jesus doeth all things well.

All the way my Savior leads me,
Cheers each winding path I tread,
Gives me grace for every trial,
Feeds me with the living Bread.
Though my weary steps may falter
And my soul athirst may be,
Gushing from the Rock before me,
Lo! A spring of joy I see;
Gushing from the Rock before me,
Lo! A spring of joy I see.

All the way my Savior leads me,
Oh, the fullness of His love!
Perfect rest to me is promised
In my Father’s house above.
When my spirit, clothed immortal,
Wings its flight to realms of day
This my song through endless ages:
Jesus led me all the way;
This my song through endless ages:
Jesus led me all the way.

 

This is my prayer each morning  and I hope it brings you the peace that it brings me.  He is all I seek and savor His presence His hope, His joy, His peace.

                                                                         Love,   Effie Darlene Barba

2 Timothy 3: Thou therefore endure hardness, as a good soldier of Jesus Christ.⁴No man that warreth entangleth himself with the affairs of this life; that he may please him who hath chosen him to be a soldier.

When I first found out that I was pregnant with Ronald, my first question to God was “How can I keep this child safe?”  At the time Alberto was barely 6 months old and I struggled to keep one baby safe in a world of violence.  I questioned God each day.  Ronald came into this world a 4 lb 4 oz preemie that looked so fragile.  As he grew, he seemed to always separate into his own world of make believe with “action figures” in his hands.  So uniquely formed by God, little did I realize all of God’s plans.  That is the case so much of the time. Yet, God knew that He needed this soldier in the streets. 

Ronald is such a unique blend of justice and mercy wrapped into one.  By the time he was five, he began to draw action figures with such unique detail.  Later, after so many trials in life, he accepted Christ as His Savior and seemed to be gifted with both justice and mercy.  Truly a complex blend of gifts that at times makes life a struggle.  He was always quiet; but would suddenly speak forth with wisdom beyond his own self.  Despite the pain or sorrow this world would fling upon him, he would sit quietly and sometimes sadly with little to say.  He would arise each day and go about the tasks set before him in silent sorrow.  Then, suddenly, as out of no where, he would come and lie down across my bed and say  “Mom, God’s timing is always perfect and He always knows what is best.” 

Ronald is now an artist, a deputy sheriff and living in his own beautiful home so uniquely and beautifully designed.  Whenever he reaches out to put his arm around me to say “Mom, I love you” or he takes my hand and smiles to let me know “It’s all ok” ; I thank God for this my son. 

God gave him strength and gentleness, wisdom and honor, truth and grace and blended it all into this very disciplined soldier of Christ.  Happy birthday my son.

^{II Corinthians  5:21}For he hath made him to be sin for us, who knew no sin; that we might be made the righteousness of God in him

Romans 5: ¹Therefore being justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ: ²By whom also we have access by faith into this grace wherein we stand, and rejoice in hope of the glory of God.

Ephesians 2: ⁸For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: ⁹Not of works, lest any man should boast. ¹⁰For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus unto good works, which God hath before ordained that we should walk in them.

II Corinthians 3:  ¹⁷Now the Lord is that Spirit: and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty. ¹⁸But we all, with open face beholding as in a glass the glory of the Lord, are changed into the same image from glory to glory, even as by the Spirit of the Lord.

 

I begin this story with great trepidation; because the subject can so easily be  misunderstood.  I pray that God guide each word that you might understand.  It is very difficult to openly deal with my own failures.  If I reveal the truth of my past will others judge me and then “not like me” because of my imperfections.   If I speak earnestly about the differences between grace and legalism, will some misunderstand and thereby lose their way?  Yet, Paul the apostle, also dealt with the same fear as he carefully and cautiously wrote the book of Romans.  For this entire week, I have been burdened with the desire to write this for you; yet, my own inadequacy to explain it looms before me. 

I accepted Christ as my Savior when I was 5 years old.  Immediately, I began to search and learn scriptures, seeking Him before all else.  Despite my knowing that the truth is that salvation is by grace alone, I continually felt that I needed to work very hard to earn His favor.  This was a mirror of how I believed about the world as well.  I believed, deep within me, that I was not good enough to be loved.  What was the reason a small child believed this?  I cannot say.  I only knew I constantly worked hard to be accepted and loved by those whom I met and I constantly worked hard to hopefully be loved by God.  Although I knew the scripture which was that salvation was by grace, I still believed that favor was earned and that God stood with a lightening bolt to strike me with whenever I failed.  If I could only work a little harder, maybe He could bless me.  Well, God had a lot to work before Him to undo all of this fear and guilt; yet, His Love was so great that He patiently went about the transforming work in my life.

I would go through seasons of what seemed to be successful; yet, this always was followed by my tumbling forward and my failure would once more loom before me.  How could it be that I was seeking Him and wanting to please Him  and still failing to get it right?  The area in which this was most evident was in relationships.  My entire life I had been taught by my mother that the only thing honorable for a woman was to be wife and mother.  In other words, God would not bless me unless I could get this right; as though, this would be the symbol of God’s love for me.  Perhaps that is why this was where I was consumed with the pursuit of someone to love me as proof of God’s love for me.  I got married at age 16 more to try to please my mother than for any other thing.  That began a  spiraling road of great sorrow and failure.  By age 23, despite my desperately trying to get it right, wanting to honor God—I was twice divorced and believed that God could never forgive me this.  I never questioned my salvation, I merely questioned my ability to be used of God for anything meaningful.  Then I married Pete and I worked extremely hard to gain his love so that I might thereby gain favor with God.  I was with him until his death through some very tough trials that forced me to learn to lean on God for everything and amazingly I began to learn that God’s love for me was unconditional.  It did not depend on me, it depended on Him.   He had chosen me to be His child.  He had formed me uniquely His from my mother’s womb.  He knew that He would love me.  About two years after Pete’s death, I again married this time with great hope that God was finally going to reward me for my faithfulness.  How devastating it was to discover that this man only wanted my money and when it was gone and I was facing cancer, he continued to count how much money he would have when I died.  Beyond this, he despised my precious children for their Hispanic heritage; a thing he hid before the marriage.  I had told him before I married him that one thing he would not do is ever interfere with my children; so, once more divorced, recovering from cancer and post total colectomy for ulcerative colitis—once more I was divorced.  The only thing was what money I had was now gone; but God provided each step of the way what I needed for the moment.  Many well meaning Christians, including Mom, constantly reminded me that all my trials were a result of my sin.  I kept studying scripture and began to stand up and declare “No, that is not true”   Christ had died for my sin and the price was paid there on Calvary—once and for all—never to entrap me again in it’s condemnation.   Twice more, I with great hope dated again and twice more my heart was broken.  Then, with great sadness I laid down the dream.   For about six months, I was so broken hearted that I could not seem to overcome the sorrow.  Finally, one day I looked into heaven and cried, “My time is in Your hands”  My time for sorrow, my time for joy, my time for illness and my time for wellness—all is in Your hands Lord.  Amazing, what He has done since—my only hope and joy is in Him.   It is me and God—He is all I need. 

If you remember Christ as He approached Simon Peter before he denied Him and said as recorded in Luke 22:³¹And the Lord said, Simon, Simon, behold, Satan hath desired to have you, that he may sift you as wheat: ³²But I have prayed for thee, that thy faith fail not: and when thou art converted, strengthen thy brethren.

God does not ordain our sin; yet, sometimes He allows Satan to sift us that we might grow up to be more like Him.  All the chafe and false hood must be removed that we may become a true testimony of the truth.  The amazing thing, His grace and mercy is so great that He brought good even out of my failure.  How could I not savor and long for His presence above all else?  The more I savor Him, the more my life is transformed to display His glory to the rest of the world.  Not from the outside in am I transformed; it is from the inside out.  It is His work, not mine.  The more I recognize the very depth of His Love, the more I revel in His Joy; His peace, and find I want to shout forth to the rest of the world of His mercy.  If you don’t know Him, please come just as you are to seek this free gift of love.  The true gift is His presence in you and with you.  Nothing else matters so much.  Nothing else fulfills that void in your life. 

Now perhaps you understand this poem which I wrote, Lord, let me see me through Your eyes as is presented in this video. 

There are so many things that I want to share with you, the words keep pouring through my brain and yet alas at this moment my work schedule is keeping me running.  In the meantime, let me share with you this poem and hope it warms your heart. 

A TALK WITH GOD

Oh, let me Lord delight in You

And lay all else I hold aside

For no desire could mean as much

As hear Your voice, to feel your touch

And in Your arms abide

I feel the safety of your arms

Surrounding me throughout each storm

And when the bitter winter wind

Would bid my very spirit bend

Your breath will keep me warm

Forgive me Lord, this fragile heart

Sometimes desires too much

Forgetting You are all I need

Then comes my tears, my plead

To stop and feel Your touch

I then can hear your gentle laugh

The love within Your voice

“My child I love you evermore

My gifts on you I freely pour

The best for you my choice”

Oh, Lord I want to stay right here

And sit here at Your feet

To never step away from You

And then I cannot lose my view

No chance for fear, defeat

“But child I ask then who would go

To tell the wounded broken heart

That I their lonely heart would mend

If not but you, who can I send?

If you refuse to start”

Then Father, Dear, I must say yes

To go and run Your bidding do

And You will cast aside my fears

Your hand will wipe away my tears

And keep my eyes on You

I know that You go with me now

You’re ever present in my heart

I feel Your joy arise within

I feel Your wondrous strength again

Your love will ne’er depart