Effie Darlene Barba

There are two major keys that we need in order to help us avoid the pitfalls of pride which are remembering and forgetting our own frailties.  How do I remember and forget at the same time?  It is a matter of focus in the way that we remember and forget.   Whenever God blesses someone with great revelations or understanding, there is a tendency with human nature to begin to think too greatly of ourselves as though the hours of study, the applause of others, the hours of prayer spent, the trials overcome, the temptations we have overcome, and the resulting success had been somehow our own doing.  After all it is "my obedience which lead to my success and this position I now hold with God."  Or did it have anything to do with me?  Can I look at someone else’s Christian walk with criticism, comparing myself to them with some sense of pride?    Was that not what the Apostle warned against in I Corinthians 10, "¹² Wherefore let him that thinketh he standeth take heed lest he fall."

Key #1 Remembering 

I need to remember that "For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh,) dwelleth no good thing: for to will is present with me; but how to perform that which is good I find not." (Romans 7:18).  This is when remembering all the times I have failed God truly stands as proof of my utter unworthiness before a Righteous God.  Were I to list for you my life’s horrendous failures as a Christian, I would be here all day; and I would give you reason for pride.  That would not be of any benefit to you. As I remember my own unworthiness; again, as Paul I must say "^{14 …}God forbid that I should glory, save in the cross of our Lord Jesus Christ, by whom the world is crucified unto me, and I unto the world." (Galatians 6) 

Therefore, I must remember the Glory and Righteousness of God which ever increasingly He reveals to me.  The more I know of Him, the more I realize the depth of darkness that lies within my own heart.  That in turn causes me to seek to know Him more because of His Mercy and Grace to this undeserving child.  It is only in that Grace that I might stand or perform anything good.  Not my own acts; but His Glory which reflects back to Him magnified as though reflected in a mirror.  This is not my own light; but reflects outward God’s Glory when and only when I empty myself of me.  This mirror is in constant need of polishing to keep the smudges from obscuring God’s reflection. 

When we remember our own frailty and our own past failures, Satan begins to whisper in our ears "You are such a failure, God can’t use you."  Then we risk becoming paralyzed, focus on our own inadequacies, and once more focus our eyes on ourselves. That is a sense of pride that perhaps my sins are bigger than Christ’s blood to cover them.  Suddenly, I see myself’s inabilities as bigger than God’s abilities.  It is then that we must apply forgetting.

Key #2 Forgetting

God has promised that "¹² For I will be merciful to their unrighteousness, and their sins and their iniquities will I remember no more."  If I truly believe this, then though I may remember it was grace that saved me and grace that sustains me because I have nothing of my own that I can lay before the cross of which I can be proud; yet, His Grace bids me to stand in that Grace. It is upon His Grace I can stand, not my own works.  That reality bids me to forget the past and press forward.  "¹² Not as though I had already attained, either were already perfect: but I follow after, if that I may apprehend that for which also I am apprehended of Christ Jesus.

¹³ Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before,

¹⁴ I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus." (Philippians 3)

So, to avoid the pitfalls of pride we must remember where we came from.  Never can we cover up our own frailties and our own failures.  That way we can always remember that  "¹⁷ Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and cometh down from the Father of lights," (James 1)    It has never been because of my own deserving of that gift or my hard work paying off.  Then, I must not remain trapped there in my past; I must forget the power of my past sins and take on the righteousness of God to press forward.  As Hebrews 12 reminds us. "let us lay aside every weight (our guilt included), and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us,² Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith"The more I exercise the keys of Remembering and Forgetting, the more I realize the depth of love that God has for me and the Joy He desires to share with me.  He becomes then my greatest treasure which I am drawn by His Love and Grace to seek Him with all my heart, my body, and my soul.  Only then can I drive stakes into this covetous, self exalting heart and stand by Grace Alone.  Romans 5:

"Therefore being justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ:

² By whom also we have access by faith into this grace wherein we stand, and rejoice in hope of the glory of God."

WHEN I CAME TO THE END OF ME

So many times I strayed  from you

And wondered what was I  to do

I tried so hard to do your will

I could not see I should stand still

What could I do to bring you a gift

The harder I tried, the more I’d drift

I reached that point, reality

I broke your heart, still you loved me

CHORUS:  When I didn’t have the strength

You were so strong

When my heart was filled with tears

You were my song

You are the love,

you are the peace,

you are the joy that flows in me

When I didn’t have a hope

At the end of my life’s rope

And I couldn’t find my way

Your Grace saved this wandering stray

And now I know a different me

It is your love that set me free

That in this world I might now see

All that you are, your majesty

When I came to the end of me

My love for you, Your love for me

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CK_dwXcK86E

Almost all the self help books that one reads today, there is a theme which would point one toward a greater sense of self-esteem as the key to success.  We are urged to develop our sense of pride in who we are.  Whatever point of success, we pat ourselves on the back and say "Attaboy, you deserved the promotion for working so hard.  Or, "good job, look at me Lord.  Look what I have done for you."  Particularly, this happens during moments of prosperity; when the blessings are plenty and the trials are diminished.  The same was true of the journey of the Israelite Nation in the Old Testament.  We need not to look at these scriptures and say "Why did they grumble and fall down so much?"  Instead, we might want to look at these scriptures and say, "Wow, looks like me" and be encouraged by God’s Grace in dealing with them. We need to learn from their recorded mistakes so that we might learn to see the pitfalls and perhaps avoid some of them.  I would dare to say that sin is a result of lack in faith in God and results from our taking our eyes off of Him and placing them elsewhere.  Pride is one issue that causes us to take our eyes off of God–and causes us to look to ourselves; which is a disastrous move. Whenever I put my faith in me, I am following a fool. 

Proverbs 16: ¹⁸ Pride goeth before destruction, and an haughty spirit before a fall.

As the Israelite Nation was about to cross over Jordan to their promised land, Moses warned them. Deuteronomy 8: ¹¹ Beware that thou forget not the Lord thy God,…

¹² Lest when thou hast eaten and art full…

¹⁴ Then thine heart be lifted up, …¹⁷ And thou say in thine heart, My power and the might of mine hand hath gotten me this wealth.

¹⁸ But thou shalt remember the Lord thy God: for it is he that giveth thee power

Paul realized this.  He had been given great revelations regarding the gospel and was the one who wrote the largest portion of the New Testament through his letters to the churches.

2 Corinthians 12: 6 For though I would desire to glory, I shall not be a fool; for I will say the truth: but now I forbear, lest any man should think of me above that which he seeth me to be, or that he heareth of me.

⁷ And lest I should be exalted above measure through the abundance of the revelations, there was given to me a thorn in the flesh, the messenger of Satan to buffet me, lest I should be exalted above measure.

So for all of you seeking to find self-exalting, prosperity seeking religion; I have little to offer you, except the same warnings Moses gave the Israelite Nation–"Beware that you forget not the Lord thy God."   The counterfeit Joys you seek will leave you empty and brokenhearted in the end.  The only true Joy can be found in a relationship with God, our Creator.  Neither are we to wallow in our guilt becoming ineffective for God–but that we will discuss tomorrow as I help to give you the keys to learning how to as Paul "¹² I know both how to be abased, and I know how to abound: every where and in all things I am instructed both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need.

¹³ I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me." Philippians 4

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-LbHd6eZrgk&list=UU42mNOLo78vBCpPh34HSUTw&index=4

 

When I First Came to Know Him

 

When I first came to know him

So many years ago

I vowed that I would serve him

With heart and mind and soul

Then I found that in my strength

I would but only fail

Then He came and He told me

As we walked down life’s trail

1^st chorus

I’ll be your strength when you are weary

And your hope when skies are gray

I’ll be your faith when yours is failing

And your light on each dark day

I’ll be the love your lonely heart

When it’s breaking in despair

I’ll be all in all your everything

If you look to me in prayer

I strove on in my strength

And strayed so very far

Until my life was broken

And sin had left it’s scar

Then I cried, Oh, my Father

How deeply I had failed

Then He came and He held me

And His love prevailed

2^nd Chorus

Now He’s my strength when I am weary

And my hope when skies are gray

He is my faith when mine is failing

And my light on each dark day

He is the love to my lonely heart

When it’s breaking in despair

He is all in all my everything

When I look to him in prayer

 

Now if you have strayed from

Or never knew His love

Then turn your eyes toward Jesus

And seek Him from above

He will take all your brokenness

And fill it with Himself

He will take all your sin away

And fill each empty shelf.

3^rd Chorus

He’ll be your strength when you are weary

And your hope when skies are gray

He’ll be your faith when yours is failing

And your light on each dark day

He’ll be the love to your lonely heart

When it’s breaking in despair

He’ll be all in all your everything

If you look to Him in prayer

So often when we pray, we stand back and hand God a list of petitions or pleas.  We are so caught up in what we need and so distraught with the problems surrounding us.  The whispering thoughts of Satan’s doubts and lies fill our minds with hopelessness, fears, and dread.  Sometimes, like David, we need to just sit and marvel at the Grace, the Love, and Mercy of God.  Can we lay aside all these fears and focus on the Omniscient God who loves us completely and chose us out of the darkness before we were ever born.  Knowing every time I would stubbornly head off in the wrong direction, every time I would foolishly be beguiled to wander off, and every time I would doubt Him–He still chose me.  Never has He said– "Oops, I am so sorry I chose her–what a mess up she is." That is mercy and grace beyond measure.

Psalm 139: ¹³ For thou hast possessed my reins: thou hast covered me in my mother’s womb.

¹⁴ I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well.

¹⁵ My substance was not hid from thee, when I was made in secret, and curiously wrought in the lowest parts of the earth.

¹⁶ Thine eyes did see my substance, yet being unperfect; and in thy book all my members were written, which in continuance were fashioned, when as yet there was none of them.

¹⁷ How precious also are thy thoughts unto me, O God! how great is the sum of them!

¹⁸ If I should count them, they are more in number than the sand: when I awake, I am still with thee.

What an amazing thought.  For some of you the King James is difficult; but for this verse, all the versions I checked seemed to lose the savor.  Perhaps let me paraphrase these verses for you as I hear them. 

God, before I was ever born and from eternity past, You chose to take charge of my life.  What an incredible, unbelievable thought too great for me to imagine and I must fall before You in praise and worship for all You have done.  You saw me, even before the creation of the world, and You saw me with all my imperfections, my failures, my doubts, my sins. Still, You chose me to be written in Your book of Life.  So precious are the thoughts You have toward me, more numerous than I could ever say thank you enough for.  Because of all this I know that each and every morning when I awake, I am still Yours and You will be right there beside me.  My faith, my hope, my eternity is based on Your Uncompromising Grace toward me determined by You before I was ever born.  How could I ever repay such Love?  I can do no less than to surrender my life to You.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WWehzQbQ6IA

Whenever we find ourselves in a situation for which we are filled with anger, frustration and then we find our words and deeds demonstrating that which we recognize quickly to be un-Christlike behavior; what do we do?   We excuse ourselves for not being able to forgive someone.  After all, they have hurt us so deeply that we have the right to be angry.  We have blurted out words that are meant to hurt or injure them in the same manner they have hurt us.  We search for evidences to prove that we are right in our anger and bitterness.  We pray and try to lay the anger at the cross, seeking forgiveness; yet, within the next few hours, once more, the evidence of our unforgiving heart blurts out some statement or proof that we are right in our anger.   When these cruel words once more pour from our lips; we recognize that we have not truly dealt with the issue.  Instead we have only tried to cover it up.  We realize that deep within the recesses of our heart there stands a much bigger issue that we have not dealt with.  So, perhaps, the better question would be instead of what do we do; what can I do that will result in my fulfilling Ephesians 4?

Ephesians 4: ³¹ Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice:

³² And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.

The following steps will help you and me to recognize the root of the problem, so that we might present Christ to the world in all that we say or do.

1. Plunge deep into the recesses of your heart to locate those areas of darkness locked away. You don’t want those exposed even to God.  Perhaps you are afraid that if God saw the depth of covetousness, the desires for self exaltation; He wouldn’t be able to love you anymore.  The truth is…He already knows every thought and every blemish of your heart; and, yet, He has chosen to love you.  Psalm 69: ^{5 "}O God, thou knowest my foolishness; and my sins are not hid from thee." Often, it is there where we have hidden some painful memory which we have capped so tightly that we think we have hidden it from ourselves; but, it sits waiting to explode into our current situations. Ask God to help you recognize it so that God can gently take it, covering you with His love while you weep in His arms until the pain goes away.

2. Remember that God is on His Throne.  Nothing can happen within the Christian’s life but what it has been either ordained by God or has been allowed by His Sovereign will.  If that is true and God’s promise is that all things work together for good to those who love God (Romans 8:28); then within everything God has a plan.  Sometimes that plan is to sift us so as to remove the chaff that remains in our hearts.  His purpose is to make us look more like Christ.  There are things within us that may require pain to remove them.  There are things that need to be purified by fire which we would attempt to hold tightly and He needs to burn so that we become more like Christ.

3. Identify what is the true source of your distress with the issue.  That is sometimes a laborious task and can only occur as we ask God to reveal it to us.  I guarantee you that whenever we feel hurt or wronged it comes from a deeper problem within our own heart than whatever the perceived offence is.  And, yes, I said perceived.  Most of the time it is our perception and the reality is that the other person never meant to cause harm; but were themselves trying to deal with deeper trials or desires of their own. Generally our response is coming from fear (a lack of faith), recollections of painful moments from our past, reactions to unresolved past conflicts with someone else that we have stuffed into the darkest recesses of our heart. "for of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaketh." Luke 6:45

4. Delve into the scriptures to grasp hold of the covenant promises of God and cling to them.  I am certain that in step three you will discover that there are issues which you have never by faith accepted God’s promise to cover.  Sin is always evidence of a faith issue.  Do you really believe all that God has said?  If that were true, you could never be anxious, unruffled, sorrowful, or affected by the circumstances that surround you; instead, you would have peace, joy, hope, and love which continuously reflects Glory back to God as a mirror reflecting to the world His Glory (not your own.) "But without faith it is impossible to please him: for he that cometh to God must believe that he is, and that he is a rewarder of them that diligently seek him." Hebrews 11:6

5. Erase the negative audio tapes that play in your head and replace them with new tapes. You know which tapes I am talking about.  Follow Paul’s directions when replacing those tapes with new ones. "whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things" Philippians 4:8

There you have it, if you take the first letters of each word you will find the word PRIDE.  You might say; but mine is not pride I am struggling with self doubt?  Is that not also pride?  Do you think that you are so important that your mistakes, self frustrations, sins are too big for God to forgive or to take care of?  Sometimes, self doubt is a form of backwards pride because it still keeps me focused on myself and not on my Savior.  When focused on my self doubt or desires I become  preoccupied by my self and I forget that it is not about me. It is about a world in need of a Savior and God needs me to reflect His Glory, His Love, and His Joy to a desperate world.

So, let me end this with a story.  Much of my life I have struggled with the need to feel loved, the need to feel validated, and the need to feel that at least at something I was good.  That has pushed me further and has been a motivating factor in my life which can be good; but as with everything it becomes a matter of the heart whether that can be good or turn toward self exalting behaviors.  I worked very hard to succeed at work.  Whatever task was placed in my hands I marched forward and asked God for His guidance and strength, recognizing it was not my own strength that could accomplish it.  When did that turn from being a mission for God into something that I clung to with all my soul?  I can’t tell you.  Perhaps I would have never known that it had changed; until one day God ripped the secure position I thought was my stronghold from my grasping hands.  My position was suddenly changed and I became frightened, angry, frustrated, and I felt betrayed.  I wanted to find someone to blame; someone for whom I could be angry. I plunged deep into my heart to try to understand this anger; because, I knew that anger could not be a part of who I am in Christ and could cause harm to the name of Christ.  I needed to find those dark spots in my heart so that God’s light could shine into them, dispelling their power.  At first, I did not realize it was God who ripped it from my hands. Remembering the truth of Romans 8:28 I told myself that if God is in control and His plan was to make all things work together for good; then this was part of His Plan for my life.  So I began to pray desperately to remove the anger and please not allow this to hurt my testimony for God.  I would think finally I had conquered this when suddenly out of nowhere came angry thoughts or snide words.  Ok, so there must be something much deeper I needed to identify.  I began a nightly journey in which I asked God to reveal the source.  There it was, I had replaced  my only true source of joy (God) with a counterfeit joy in my work. I had begun to believe that my protection, my sense of being loved, and my security were found in my job; rather, than truly trusting God when ever the counterfeit joy seemed to slip from my hands.  I delved into the scripture once more to cling tight to my only hope which was grounded in the covenant promises of God who was the one who loved me, provided for me, and protected me.  Then, I began the arduous task of erasing all the negative tapes and replacing them with those of virtue and kindness.  What a patient, gentle, and loving Father I have.  He has a plan for my life and I trust Him to finish the work He has begun in me. I could now fulfill Ephesians 4: 31-32; at least for today until some other piece of chaff needs to be sifted and I must walk through these steps again.  Knowing this, "¹³ Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before,

¹⁴ I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus." Philippians 3: 13-15.

So what stands in your way of fulfilling Ephesians 4: 31-32.  Read the verse again, now that you know the steps to guide you toward fulfilling it.

Ephesians 4: ³¹ Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice:

³² And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.

This week I am going to be at the SCORRE conference learning to be a better speaker and better communicator in my writing.  This is my desire so that I might share with you in a more effective manner.  For that reason please feel free to read older posts and search for messages that may have been specifically for you.  This for me has become one of my greatest passions and desires–how do I tell you about Christ so that you can find the same Joy, Hope, and Love.  My life has been a marvelous journey through many valleys that lead me to my greatest mountaintop.  I believe that this has been my destiny and I marvel at the grace of God who has so gently taught me.  So let me ask you, what are you passionate about and what do you see as your destiny.  Listen to these words carefully.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iL1L5yivru8

Philippians 3:  ¹² Not as though I had already attained, either were already perfect: but I follow after, if that I may apprehend that for which also I am apprehended of Christ Jesus.

¹³ Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before,

¹⁴ I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.

A TALK WITH GOD

Oh, let me Lord delight in You

And lay all else I hold aside

For no desire could mean as much

As hear Your voice, to feel your touch

And in Your arms abide

I feel the safety of your arms

Surrounding me throughout each storm

And when the bitter winter wind

Would bid my very spirit bend

Your breath will keep me warm

Forgive me Lord, this fragile heart

Sometimes desires too much

Forgetting You are all I need

Then comes my tears, my plead

To stop and feel Your touch

I then can hear your gentle laugh

The love within Your voice

“My child I love you evermore

My gifts on you I freely pour

The best for you my choice”

Oh, Lord I want to stay right here

And sit here at Your feet

To never step away from You

And then I cannot lose my view

No chance for fear, defeat

“But child I ask then who would go

To tell the wounded broken heart

That I their lonely heart would mend

If not but you, who can I send

If you refuse to start”

Then Father, Dear, I must say yes

To go and run Your bidding do

And You will cast aside my fears

Your hand will wipe away my tears

And keep my eyes on You

I know that You go with me now

You’re ever present in my heart

I feel Your joy arise within

I feel Your wondrous strength again

Your love will ne’er depart