What Happens When The Potter Decides To Remold The Vessel?

 

Arise, and go down to the potter’s house, and there I will cause thee to hear my words. Then I went down to the potter’s house, and, behold, he wrought a work on the wheels. And the vessel that he made of clay was marred in the hand of the potter: so he made it again another vessel, as seemed good to the potter to make it. Then the word of the Lord came to me, saying, O house of Israel, cannot I do with you as this potter? saith the Lord. Behold, as the clay is in the potter’s hand, so are ye in mine hand, O house of Israel. Jeremiah 18:2-6

Life settled in ok. In some ways it seemed this long distance marriage had the benefit of not having to deal with how different we were. Before I married Terry, I had placed one rule. “You do not know the history of all my children have had to face. You will not interfere in how I choose to discipline, raise, or guide my children. If you disagree with what I have done; then, you will tell me in private. I will take your thoughts into consideration.” He swore to abide by this rule and did. Actually, he never even took the time to speak with or get to know my sons.  All seemed well. Comfortable at least.

When the Master Potter choses to remake you, what then?

I began to wonder about getting my Master’s Degree to become a Nurse Practitioner. Maybe then, I could better support my family. When I applied to Vanderbilt, Terry told me, “You won’t get accepted there.  I’ve known too many nurses who tried and that school is too hard to get in to.” But I was accepted right away, and was asked to start in September 1997. I thought about delaying, except Alberto and Ronald both told me to “do it.” They assured me that they could be responsible enough to manage the house and attend high school each day. I trusted them to do just that and told them so.  They were

amazing young men, very mature and centered for their age.  I would be home each weekend. Mom agreed to fix their breakfast and dinner each day if I left a weekly menu laid out. So, I accepted and began my studies.  Nashville was a 4 hour drive from Dexter.  I would leave either Sunday evening or Monday morning depending on my class schedule; then, on Friday I made it home in time for the kickoff of the football (Alberto was the kicker).  I worked the weekend as Nursing Supervisor and during the week I had a part time job at Vanderbilt.

QUESTIONS OF A MOTHER’S HEART

Was that the right decision? Should I have said no to Vanderbilt or at least “wait?” A question that returns from time to time whenever I see one of my sons struggle. As a mother I can look back over my life and always wonder “what could I have done better?” Children are such special gifts from God. They should be cherished and cared for with great love and guidance with enough freedom to become all that God has gifted them to become. As a mother, I could always look back and question all of what I did. Yet, again; a Sovereign God is never taken by surprise. Never does He say “oops, I didn’t see that one coming.” In fact, I was about to discover that His Sovereign Hand had guided that very move with all its consequences. God was about to take this vessel and remold it completely.

A SOVEREIGN GOD KNOWS BEST

Little did I know as I headed off to Vanderbilt that one year later I would be diagnosed with a very aggressive form of breast cancer! Had I not been at Vanderbilt, I doubt it would have even been discovered. It was growing flat, lying far to the back of the breast. The lump that they biopsied, the cyst they found, and all the mammograms didn’t reveal it. Because I was at such an excellent facility; they chose to do an open biopsy to be certain. There it was lurking in the background hidden from sight. Much like our sins of doubt and fear are at times. We say that we trust God with our lives and think that we really do. Then the storm comes and we find ourselves crying out in fear. When our faith is tested, how much do we really trust that God’s Sovereign will in our lives is the best? When God needs to remold our hearts or to sift the chafe in our lives; how much do we really trust Him?

But without faith it is impossible to please him: for he (man, woman, or child) that cometh to God must believe that He (God) is, and that He is a rewarder of them that diligently seek Him. Hebrews 11:6

[bctt tweet=”What best reveals our love toward & our faith in God is our ability to trust Him in the storm! “]Do I really believe that God is the great “I am?” Do I really believe His promise that “all things work together for good to those who love God?” When God decides to remold this clay vessel to create another, do I really believe He is Sovereign and will reform me into a vessel of joy and love that will shine forth His Glory? Those are the questions I was about to face as I began the next stage of my journey to discovering the truth of love. Everything that I had learned of God was about to be put to the maximum test as I faced Cancer head on. Everything that I believed about life and myself was also about to be tested.

Today I want to leave you with a question to ponder and I would love to hear what you think!!

What does it mean to believe that God is?

The song I chose for you today is I AM  Close your eyes and listen as though God is singing to you.

 

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©Effie Darlene Barba, 2016

Disclosure of Material Connection: I have not received any compensation for writing this post.  I have no material connection to the brands, products, or services that I have mentioned.  I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.