I will praise thee, O Lord, among the people: and I will sing praises unto thee among the nations For thy mercy is great above the heavens: and thy truth reacheth unto the clouds. Be thou exalted, O God, above the heavens: and thy glory above all the earth; That thy beloved may be delivered: save with thy right hand, and answer me. Psalm 108:3-6
As I sat and stared at an empty page this morning, I prayed. Prayer is my only hope. From the time I post the previous post to the moment I begin the next, my mind is prayerfully searching to know where to turn and what to write. That is sometimes easier when I am doing a series through any book of the Bible; because, then I must focus on God’s word and from that wait for God to guide my understanding through commentaries, prayerful searching and even listening to sermons. Certainly, at work I must focus on work; yet, as I walk the halls between tasks, I sometimes hear a word, a thought that inspires my understanding of the scripture at hand. That is Grace.
When I finished the series on the gospel of John in mid-February, I felt compelled to begin a series about love. Before I started the series, I questioned God in earnest as to why this series. Yet, the longer I questioned; the stronger the conviction came. As I have opened up to each of you all my own failures along this road toward discovering the truth of love, I have at times felt very vulnerable and very frail. As always, God has been faithful to reveal to this weary heart His Grace each step of the way. Along this journey of writing the story of my life, God has revealed to me truths about me as well. Truths as shunned to know as I have been forced to look deep into the mirror of my own life, my own heart. When there was a time it would have been easier to just blame Miguel, Pete, Terry or even Mom for their role in breaking my heart; now, I couldn’t.
Suddenly, I have had to face the truth of my own pride, covetousness, anger, and doubt along my journey. All of which are destroyers of love. Each of those emotions can squelch the joy of love and by such choke out love from it’s very roots. It is painful at times to face the honest truthfulness of the mirror; yet, that is the only way to continue to grow and to find a higher love than you have ever thought possible. Only when you face the truth can you lay aside all the counterfeit loves and joys to exchange them for true joy and true love. So, it has been as I revealed to you my story; God has been revealing to me, the truth of my story. Piece by piece, step by step He has opened me up to reveal my own frailties; while at the same time revealing His Glorious Love and Grace toward me.
So, it is as I gaze once more at my time in Springfield; what do I tell you next? Do I tell you of my blundering finances in part due to my generous heart who always believed that if I was generous to others I was somehow showing God’s love? Or do I tell you of a God that so Graciously provided even when I wasn’t certain if the next check could cover the bills. Do I tell you that next they found a mass on the pancreas and I was certain God was calling me home? Or do I tell you of a God whose one desire was that I focus on Him to discover the depth of His love for me. His desire was for me to discover Joy in Him, here and now. He did not need some dutiful little Christian soldier carrying her cross. He needed a heart so fully secured in Him that she would realize Him as her greatest treasure and rejoice in His goodness toward her, as He carried the cross. Do I tell you that my foolish heart once more believed in the fairy tale fantasy and felt perhaps God would bring her prince Charming here on earth? Or do I tell you of God’s command to leave Springfield with a broken heart; only, to later realize that God’s command had been to protect me from my own foolish heart. Perhaps, I do owe you that part of the story; after all, it is my search for love’s truth. So, I will give you that on Friday.
Of all people, I would have chosen me last to be the one to write about Love; yet, perhaps that is why God would choose me. So often He has chosen some of the least likely people to do His work. My prayer is that each time I write, He takes control and touches some heart in need. My prayer is that He use this for His Glory.
Let me conclude today with this truth for you. Where ever my road led me, it has been God’s ever pursuing love that searched me out and guided each winding path. He has picked up the shattered pieces of my heart over and over again; even though it was I who kept shattering it.[bctt tweet=” God’s patient steady love won the victory in my heart: He is my greatest treasure & Joy” username=”effiedarlene”] He is reaching out His hand to you as well; will you trust Him with your heart today?
Now unto him that is able to keep you from falling, and to present you faultless before the presence of his glory with exceeding joy, To the only wise God our Saviour, be glory and majesty, dominion and power, both now and ever. Amen. Jude 24-25
The song I chose for you today is: The God I Know
photo used by permission https://unsplash.com/samscrim
©Effie Darlene Barba, 2016
Disclosure of Material Connection: I have not received any compensation for writing this post. I have no material connection to the brands, products, or services that I have mentioned. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.