5 Lessons from God to Overcome Jealous Rage ⋆ Effie Darlene Barba

The longer I stuffed those insane feelings of jealousy toward Mom into a box within my heart, the larger the flames grew. I tried to tell myself I only wanted her best. After all, sooner or later those whom I paid to care for her would all be gone. Only I would be standing, fighting for her. I desperately wanted her to see that and to just love me. Didn’t she see the sacrifices I was making? I tried to proclaim my sacrifice as love for her. However, the lies I told my heart did not make the jealousy go away. Instead they fanned the flames into a jealous rage, burning within me. I could not see, that my love was not really love if I was more concerned about me than her. My sacrifice was not born out of love; rather, it was a vain attempt at self-exaltation.

5 Lessons from God to Overcome Jealous Rage

Sometimes along this journey of life, God allows us to move forward falling head first into the mud. He allows us to fail so that we might lay aside the pride and look honestly at the rubbish within our own hearts. To cleanse us, purify us and transform our hearts into the image of Christ, He first must open our eyes to see the truth. We must see the blemishes before we are willing to seek His cleansing. Much like Peter when Christ foretold of his denying Him.

Remember what Jesus said, “Simon, Simon, behold, Satan hath desired to have you, that he may sift you as wheat” (Luke 22:31). Satan wanted to destroy Peter’s faith-to rip it from him. But Jesus prayed for Peter, that his faith would not fail him. What a wondrous thought! When Satan tries to steal my faith or destroy my testimony, Jesus is praying for me. (Hebrews 7:25, Romans 8:34). Satan could not destroy or sift away Peter’s faith. Instead, God allowed Satan’s sifting, knowing that He (God) would use that to sift away Peter’s pride. What a blow that must have been to Satan! He could no longer use Peter’s pride to destroy his testimony. What Satan meant for evil, God used for good. So, what were the lessons God taught me to overcome my jealous rage?

BE HONEST AND OPEN REGARDING MYSELF

I was so ashamed to admit my jealous rage to myself and even more so, to God. My own pride or need to feel righteous caused me to hide the truth of my feelings from me. That never works! At some point, all the flames of jealous rage would emerge; spewing forth like volcanic lava and destroying life. “If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness” (I John 1:8-9). Before I could confess my sin of jealous rage, I had to see it and name it. For jealous rage is a sin against God, first and foremost.

RECOGNIZE MY UTTER HELPLESSNESS AGAINST IT

As long as I try to fix it with my own strength, I fail. I do not have the strength to overcome my own frailties. Only God can do that. The sooner I recognize that fact, the sooner I can humbly confess my sin and allow God to cleanse my heart of the evils of jealous rage. Remember when Jesus spoke of the rich, young ruler who left sad because he did not want to leave his riches? The apostles asked Jesus, “Who can be saved?” His reply was, “With men this is impossible; but, with God all things are possible” (Matthew 19:26).

ACKNOWLEDGE THAT JEALOUS RAGE IS AGAINST GOD

Our feelings of jealous rage are actually an act against God. It is saying to God, I am dissatisfied with what you have chosen for me. The Bible speaks of this often as envy. Where ever envy lies, faith dies. As I have often quoted Hebrews 11:6, “Faith is knowing God IS and He is the rewarder of them who diligently seek Him.” If I truly believe God is Sovereign and that He rewards those who diligently seek Him, then, I will rejoice in all that he sends into my life. Knowing He only sends me his best. As we read in Proverbs 14:30, “A sound heart is the life of the flesh: buy envy the rottenness of the bones.” A sound heart is one who trusts God, abiding in His Sovereign Grace.

Or look at James 3:16: “For where envying and strife is, there is confusion and every evil work.” Acknowledge the truth, jealous rage toward another is sin against God and cannot be eradicated until you confess it as such. Then ask God to help your faith to grow. This may mean He will give you more trials and tribulations to face while growing your faith, but it is definitely well worth the pain and sorrow. As grows your faith, so grows your joy and satisfaction in all that He has given you. Jealousy will disappear as your faith enlarges.

PERFECTING US IN LOVE

God redeems all who accept Jesus Christ as their Savior. Additionally, God justifies the believer, declaring them as righteous because He has cloaked each of us with the righteousness of Christ. While in this journey on earth, He is ever about the task of transforming us into the image of Jesus Christ. Furthermore, He is perfecting us in love. That means, as He is writing His words upon our hearts, He is chipping away at our hearts of stone. In order for us to love as He loved, the fragments of our selfish, self-exalting human nature must be broken down and swept away. Yet, God does this with such patience, lovingly knowing that as we are perfected in His love our joy will become overflowing. Peace, hope, love, and faith will remain.

I Corinthians 13:4-8 (NKJV) Love suffers long and is kind. love does not envy. Love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails.

LEARN FROM JESUS

As noted, we cannot transform our own heart. But, God can. What we can do is to confess our sin, lay it at the foot of the cross. Spend time in prayer. Ask God to grow your faith; particularly, when yours is faltering. Jesus said; “Take my yoke upon you and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls” (Matthew 11:29). If you have ever felt raging jealousy, you know there is no rest for your soul there.

Soren Kierkegaard wrote concerning this kind of meekness as follows. “So, meekness bears the heavy burden lightly, and the burden of a wrong inflicted, so lightly that it seems as if the offence of the guilty one were lessened.”[1]

Meekness would mean I would have born even that which I believed were offenses or wrongs inflicted unwittingly by Mom. It could never have developed into the Jealous Rage that I felt. Thank God, He in His grace did not give up on me. Rather He ever so gently opened my eyes to see the truth.

DO YOU KNOW CHRIST AS YOUR SAVIOR?

If you don’t know Jesus Christ as your Savior: I urge you to go to my page titled How to Be Saved by clicking on this link. Because there is nothing more important than this, I urge you to seek Him today.

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For more information regarding jealousy refer to the previous posts:

How is Jealousy Like Flames From Hell

The Utter Insanity of My Jealous Thoughts

If God is a Jealous God, Why is Jealousy Bad?

Or for previous Lessons from God in this series see:

7 Lessons from God Concerning My Guilt and Shame

Or for poetry look at:

Do You Want to Know the Secret to Abiding Steadfast Joy?

ABIDING, STEADFAST JOY

A labor of love, this book provides you with 3 foundations of truth from the scripture which once known will provide you with abiding, steadfast joy. Undaunted by the storms of life; your joy will overflow.

WHEN INJUSTICE AND VIOLENCE REIGN:
Through a study of Nahum, Habukkuk, and Zephaniah; I brought their message into our modern times. Answering the questions of “Why, God?”

Providing a foundation of faith and hope; even, as we see so much evil in the world and in our nation. With so much sorrow and despair, this book I wrote to guide you into discovering God’s Perfect Plan of love; amid this chaotic world filled with life’s storms.

You may click on the picture for more information on either of these books.

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©Effie Darlene Barba, 2018
Disclosure of Material Connection: I have not received any compensation for writing this post. I have no material connection to the brands, products, or services that I have mentioned except for my own books. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.