There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love. I John 4:18
By third grade, I had taken enough speech classes to have overcome the speech impediment. There was a new “integration” policy in Dexter. There were two grade schools. One primarily had “city” kids and the other had primarily “country”. I was one of the country kids chosen to travel a little further to the other grade school, while the town wanted to integrate country children with city children. (Remember it is a small town so “city” is a relative term). Yet, for me it was a new beginning. I did have to ride the school bus an hour each way; but, I used that time to do my homework and to study. Finally, I was accepted. It was a happy time. I began to win awards in math, spelling, and even singing. There were sleep overs with my new found friends who accepted me for me. My hard work and “performance” were paying off.
Then in fifth grade, I was moved back to the first school. Determined to be acceptable, I worked very hard to become slender. My success went un-noticed by my classmates; but, I was suddenly noticed by older boys and even the new male teacher noticed me. So, I came to believe that “to be accepted” it was important to perform well and to be attractive. I began to believe the same of God’s love. God could love me only if I could perform well and could work hard for Him. By age 12, I was the substitute Sunday school teacher at church.
Continue reading “What Does Obedience Out Of Love Really Look Like?”