When facing trials and pain, all too often we become so focused on our pain; we forget the truth of God’s goodness and mercy. Never does God allow suffering in our life without His Divine Purpose being to use it for our good. At the beginning of the book of Job, he so rightly said; “What? Shall we receive good at the hand of God, and shall we not receive evil?” (Job 2:10). Then, his “counselors” began to say, “all this is because of your sin. God rightly judges you. Repent”. Job became so intent on proving himself righteous in their eyes, that he lost focus on God, demanding that God was unjust in His acts. Thus, as the layers began to be peeled away; there was exposed that thread of pride and arrogance, he had never known was there.
Although, God remained present; Job could not hear Him; because, Job was so focused on himself. Never had I thought of myself as vain or even concerned with my looks; until, cancer stole it from me. Then, as I stared into the mirror at a bald, overweight image; I loathed the image which brought back the cruel mocking sounds of others criticism of a fat little girl. I lost focus. To make matters worse, following the cancer, came the ulcerative colitis. High dose steroids caused me to develop a buffalo hump, a moon face, inability to lose weight, plus, I grew a full beard and mustache. Suddenly, exposed was my own vanity, pride and prejudices. In a society that places so much value on looks, I wanted to scream, “look inside, not on the outside.” But how often, had I failed to do the same.
